


tell me sweet little lies

by daruxxa



Series: i must believe in something (so i'll make myself believe it) [1]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Other, Prequel, Sort-of, Tammy Has A Crush On Joyce, been there done that tbh, set sometime after s01ep3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:09:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29565909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daruxxa/pseuds/daruxxa
Summary: Suddenly Tammy feels fucking ridiculous, coming into this poor woman’s house like this. “I don’t even know how to start, it’s going to sound a little crazy…”“I have been dealing with more than ‘a little crazy’ these last few days, I think I’ll be able to handle it.” Mrs. Byers looks frail and tiny, but her words and the way her eyes look at Tammy while she speaks tell a completely different story. That woman is made of fucking steel.
Series: i must believe in something (so i'll make myself believe it) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2172102
Kudos: 9





	tell me sweet little lies

**1983**

Tammy has been pacing in front of the door for like ten minutes. She doesn't feel sure about this anymore. 

"What the fuck am I doing here, what am I doing here?" she asks to herself.

She feels more and more stupid after every passing second. The Byers' dog, a big white furry thing, looks at her from its spot in front of the shed. It hasn't moved from there since Tammy got to the house, not even to sniff her. One might think that the dog is guarding the house from the shed.

Tammy makes up her mind and knocks on the door before she can change her opinion for the fifth time. Nothing happens for a few seconds, but then the door flies open so fast that Tammy steps back by instinct.

The first thing she thinks is that Mrs. Byers looks fucking unhinged, and the second is that it kind of looks good on her. The third one is that Tammy has issues.

“Hi? Can I help you?”

Mrs. Byers is looking at her as if she was looking at a ghost and Tammy feels guilty about her previous thoughts. _I’m sorry I’m not the person you are looking for_ , she kind of wants to say, but she doesn’t. “I don’t think you know me,” she says instead. “My name is Tammy Thompson.”

“What do you… You know what?" Mrs. Byers interrupts herself. She is looking behind Tammy and around the house as if she expected something to walk out of the forest and attack them. "Doesn’t matter. Come in, it’s too dark to be outside this late.”

She doesn't give Tammy the opportunity to refuse and basically drags her inside. Tammy doesn't have time to complain because she is too busy staring at her surroundings.

The whole house shines like some kind of bizarre Christmas decoration. All the lamps Mrs. Byers seems to own are on at the same time, occupying any surface available and in many cases just messily piled on top of each other in precarious ways. There are so many Christmas lights, so many, all over the place. Covering the ceiling, the walls… 

“Can I help you?”

Tammy turns around to face her. Mrs. Byers looks confused, although who wouldn't in their circumstances? 

“I… I don’t think it’s a matter of helping.” Suddenly Tammy feels fucking ridiculous, coming into this poor woman’s house like this. “I don’t even know how to start, it’s going to sound a little crazy…”

“I have been dealing with more than ‘a little crazy’ these last few days, I think I’ll be able to handle it.” Mrs. Byers looks frail and tiny, but her words and the way her eyes look at Tammy while she speaks tell a completely different story. That woman is made of fucking steel.

Tammy doesn't answer immediately, letting her gaze wander around for a few seconds while she tries to figure out what to say next. One of the walls catches her attention and makes her forget everything else for an instant. Somebody has painted the entire alphabet in big black strokes on the wall. There’s one single Christmas light nailed on top of each letter. What the fuck...?

Looking back at Mrs. Byers, Tammy breathes in and out. “My friend disappeared two nights after your son did," she explains, slowly. "People have been talking shit about it. That she ran away because she’s queer, mainly.”

She half expects Mrs. Byers to ask her whether Barb was or wasn't queer, but she doesn't.

“You don’t believe that,” Mrs. Byers estates instead. It doesn't sound like a question, not for a single second.

“Barb would never run away, ever. Not like this, at least.”

Barb would write a letter to her parents. Barb would go see Nancy, maybe even threaten Steve, tell him to treat Nancy right _or else_. Tammy seriously doubts Barb would even remember to say goodbye to her, but of one thing she is sure. Barb wouldn't run away like this.

Mrs. Byers is looking at her with sharp eyes, tilting her head as if she has just remembered something. “I think I know who you are… You are the girl that bullied the highschool into setting up a search party a few days ago.”

That, and also the girl that has been shopping at Melvald's General Store way more often than she actually needs to, but Tammy isn't about to spill her guts like that.

“Yeah…" she answers. "I thought about dividing the people into groups and looking for your son as well, but the police…”

Mrs. Byers dismissively waves a hand, apparently unimpressed about said police. “They had their own search party, yes, don’t worry about it. Come on, sit with me.”

It feels surrealist. Mrs. Byers’ son is missing and there she is, telling Tammy not to worry, walking her to the nearby kitchen and tapping on a chair. That little scrap of attention and care might be the only reason why she keeps talking.

“People showed up with beers," Tammy spits out as she drops on the chair. Behind her, she can hear Mrs. Byers fiddling in the kitchen. "Laughing. Like they knew it was useless, like they were only humoring Nancy and me and wanted to rub it on our faces. Something went wrong, really wrong that night. Something happened to Barb. But the whole town seems perfectly happy to ignore it. Fuck, this feels like Derry.”

Mrs. Byers puts a cup of coffee in front of Tammy before sitting down next to her with her own cup. “Derry?” she asks, frowning.

“Yeah, in Maine. I’m from there. People in Derry have an unmatched ability to ignore weird and creepy shit.”

The mere memory of Derry makes Tammy shiver. It feels like she has shivering for days, ever since Barb didn't show up to class. She's so tired... Mrs. Byers' coffee smells like the off-brand one but Tammy doesn't care. She takes a few sips and breathes in deeply, holding the warm cup between her hands.

For a second she feels safe.

“Sometimes it feels like you are yelling into an empty room, doesn’t it?" Mrs. Byers asks softly. "You yell and scream and cry and beg, but nobody listens...”

“... And when they do listen, they try to gaslight you,” Tammy finishes the sentence. Relief spreads through her like a wave. “I knew you would understand it. That’s why I’m here.”

Mrs. Byers' smile is small, and a little sad, but it's there as she reaches out to pet Tammy's hair. “You can always come here.”

"Thank you, Mrs. Byers."

"Oh, honey, call me Joyce."

Mrs. Byers'... Joyce's soft smile and her hand in Tammy's hair are too much. For a second she can't fucking move, can't fucking breathe.

At fifteen Tammy is mature enough to know why she has never ever had a crush on Steve, like the rest of the girls, why her stomach always felt kind of funny when Barb was around. She is definitely mature enough to know that having a crush on the local retail clerk is kind of weird. Mrs. Byers… Joyce is old enough to be her mother. Hell, her oldest son is older than Tammy.

But it is also kind of harmless. Right? A silly schoolgirl crush that will go away with time, Tammy is fairly sure of it. And Joyce is just so fucking nice, making a coffee for some girl she barely knows even though her son is still out there, looking at Tammy with tired yet soft eyes that seem to say _I know, honey, I know…_

Tammy just can’t resist.

“Nancy left me alone. She’s going through the exact same shit I am, but we have never been close and she has Steve, so they left me alone," she confesses. "I’m going fucking crazy.”

“You are not alone." Joyce grabs her hand and grips it tightly, looking at Tammy with an intensity that doesn't seem to fit in her small body. "We are going to find them, you hear me? We are going to find them.”

-x-

It’s funny how words work. Somebody finds Will, lost in the woods after a whole week. Nobody finds Barb, and she doesn't reappear either.

Tammy’s mother leaves her alone, forever busy at work. Tommy H. and Carol leave her as soon as Tammy stops being funny -they will come back, but she doesn't know if she cares about it at all. Nancy doesn’t leave her because that would imply that she was there to begin with, but she never was.

Steve (and this fucking hurts) leaves her for the first time ever, choosing to focus on his girlfriend and not on his best friend.

Joyce Byers welcomes her at her doorstep with coffee and pastries and a hug, and Tammy isn't fucking stupid.

Something happened. Something happened, little Will Byers had something to do with it and the woman in front of her knows it. But Tammy is weak. She has always been weak. Giving in is easier than keeping up the fight. Tammy accepts Joyce's coffee and her store-bought pastries and her hugs and her sweet fucking little lies. It's better than the alternative.


End file.
